Anyone who has ever managed or supervised someone else knows what it feels like to have to give performance management feedback. And, anyone who has ever been on the receiving end of a performance conversation knows that feeling as well. Many times in my career I have had discussions with managers who know that someone who works for them is not doing the job to their satisfaction as their manager. They know they need to sit down with them and have the hard conversation, but they put it off and avoid doing so because it is hard and they risk that the other person will get upset at them and upset in general. So, the conversation gets avoided, the person who is not doing well keeps doing what they are doing, thinking that they are doing a good job, and the manager gets more and more frustrated and upset with their employee and with themselves. And, believe it or not, I have seen this cycle go on for weeks, months and in some circumstances, for years. Beyond the problem that this is poor management and that the performance of the company suffers, the real problem is that we are not being honest with each other and by not giving the tough feedback, the tough love if you will, we are actually hurting the person who needs the feedback. How will they grow and develop if they don’t hear what they need to hear to get better? Anyone who leads people long enough will have to fire someone along the way for poor performance. I’ve been there and done that. It is not fun in any shape or form. It is agonizing but usually more agonizing beforehand than after. In my experience, once someone gets the true feedback that can make them better, even if that means having to change jobs, they, at some point, feel relieved and better for having heard the truth. We are supposed to be truthful with each other, regardless of how hard it is. In Proverbs 27:17 it says, “As iron sharpens iron, a friend sharpens a friend”. When iron hits iron, yes, sparks can fly, but it is the only way that iron can be sharpened. Today, as you think about the performance of someone who works for you, or with you, or even as you think about your own performance on the job, think through the short and long term ramifications of not being forthright and truthful about job performance. It is hard without a doubt, but the benefits of knowing where you stand and others knowing where they stand, far outweighs the discomfort of the difficult conversation. Let us sharpen each other today so that none of us become dull and lose the edge that we so need to stay competitive in today’s job market. Everyone benefits from truthful performance management.

Reference: Proverbs 27:17 (New Living Testament)